Tuesday, May 27, 2008

累~

不是没有想过,而是每一次开始考虑时脆弱的我都会被‘过去’牵着走

原谅我有我仍放不下的过去,仍有旧梦待续 我还跨不出那个框框

我 其实还算满了解你的。 我知道给你那答案也许会令到你无法像以前那样对待我

我选择坚持那决定,因为当时的我真的很没有勇气去接受那一切的一切

今天下午,巧合下与你擦肩而过,你却视我为陌生人

已经找不到当初你见到我时的那份喜悦了 心,酸

一个多月了,我们都没面对面跟对方沟通,只是你偶尔还会传简讯给我

为什么我们不能像以前那样?什么都能谈,什么都说?

虽然认识你的日子不久,可是那段跟你蛮熟的日子,我是真的有开心过

我会怀念那时的我们,可是我不会去期待未来的任何改变,因为那感觉,不对

或许将来我的想法会有所改变,也许一切都会不同,可是生命充满着未知数

恕我无法为你承诺些什么,更无法跟你做出任何约定

真的很希望你能够好像以前那样开开心心的,不要因为我而改变,那不值得

你有你沉迷的电脑游戏,我有我无法接受的原因,我们还是朋友么?

*疑惑*

下午冷冷的对待,晚上却发简讯给我的你,到底心里在想些什么

原谅我没回复你,因为我希望某天你能再次有勇气面对面跟我沟通。

我,突然觉得好累~

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Yay. Yay.

You don't know how much i've been missin you for the past 2 weeks.
You can never imagine how dull and colourless my life was without you.
You will never know how much i wish you were here when i needed you.
I missed you so much that i dreamt about you almost every nite~
I need you so much that i think i can't live my life without you.
No doubt that you play a very very important part in my life.
Glad that finally u're back to me~~My dearest lappie~~ XD ~

Saturday, May 24, 2008

=)

你说看不见未来在哪里
其实未来一直在你手里
听仔细心中的旋律
那是最诚恳的声音
要为自己呼吸
至少还有我懂得关心
别在乎我的哀愁
我只是一个路过暂停的小人物
我只要你快乐就够
别在乎我的哀愁
不要害怕继续勇敢地往前走
就像世界下一片天空
我可以为你画出美丽的彩虹
新的总要来旧的总要走
停留不一定永久
请珍惜你依靠的所有
如果有一天你还记得我
我还是你最高的高峰
Believe in your dreams,
the goals you've always
wanted to achieve.
Believe in your abilities,
that you are capable
and worthy of being
and doing anything.
Life holds no promises
to what you can have.
It gives you opportunities
to utilize your abilities.
It gives you time
to make choices and
take chances.
Be willing to accept
life's challenges.
Embrace changes that
come along the way.
Never give up.
Be passionate to make
your dreams a reality.
Believe that it is possible
to achieve what you
want and you will.

Sigh.

..........................................

S-I-G-H

Monday, May 19, 2008

Cold cold life.

Today is a brand new start for this week. And it's Wesak. And it's our xing xing's big day! ~~Happy birthday, xing~~

Actually wanted to follow a trip to a temple in Brickfields organised by my college Buddhist Society one, but due to the long hours need to be sacrificed if i were to join the trip, I didn't join it larh. It was a last minute decision though. Coz I am seriously running out of time. And why am i blogging here? hrmmm...de-stress de-stress~!! XD

Early morning, went to library study....alone. (since i can never study with others, i'll end up bilibalabilibala~`) Spent hours in there, till about 5pm when it's closing only i left. Guess i'll be spending my days in library for the coming 2 weeks time. Start to get used to the temperature there already, now i can SURVIVE without jacket in there! lols..

All of us. Group6 and Group8. are now left with T9 EDC classes, which will only last for 3 days.. Then, next sem, don't know will we be able to be in the same class, doing crazy stuffs together, having fun together or not. Maybe yes maybe no. It's all depends on the results which will be released only in August. Doesnt matter it will be a yes or a no, certain people will still remain important in my heart. That is something won't change. Whatever it is, we try to maintain what we're having right now okay? It's not easy to build that kind of friendship. [Hope that YOU are reading this] I hope u know, u really play a part in US, ur jokes, ur silliness, ur seriousness when comes to problems, ur willingness to share ur probs and my probs, i will NEVER forget. We will still be like how we used to be okay? at least i know we will try to maintain it, okay? =)

Gambateh, everyone!

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Happy ME? XD

Today, a fren of mine actually asked me why do i always being so emo when comes to blogging. She said i looked real fine n happy, not like how she thought i was when she read my blogs. Well...Some ppl are just so great in hiding their true feelings, aren't they? I think i'm one of them lar since YOU said i look damn happy..hahahah.

Anyway, today is good. T7 edc class started today, urhmmmm to be honest i only paid full attention to Mr J. before the lunch break. After that, i was feeling so bored~~those questions he asked us to do today are similar to wat we've done in class b4. @@ therefore, most of the time i was just talking and busybody-ing around with few of them sitting near me =P

Feeling so tired ryte now, I need vacation!! *desperately*

About 20 days to final exam, i can really SMELL it already after meeting up with ms. margeret yesterday. Kinda anticipating the exam, and hope it can pass as soon as possible though i'm not well prepared yet, dunno y~
Mock exam result for T8 was sucks. Though i passed, but that was really so so so out of my expectation! Cuz i actually revised all the pyq's and yet i get such a low marks. Is this a bad indication? I don't know what's wrong. well, actually i know lar. Problem is still -> easy to read, easy to memorize, hard to recall! bahhhhh~ sometimes really get so frustrated when u put in all the efforts and in return, u get something real below ur expectation. What to do..Life~~

Less than 3 weeks left for me, i must not give up on any of the 3 subjects NOW! Must work even harder!! ahhhh~ i can't imagine what will happen to me if i need to spend extra 6 months in CAT again!! To some ppl, they might feel that it's okay, but for me its a definite NO!! No matter how, all these 3 papers must be cleared by this june!! must~!!! I shall not disappoint my parents. and myself ofcoz. =)

Gambateh everyone! To those who are having final exams ryte now, good luck n all da best! :)

Distance, the best way of curing pain.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

No U-Turn.

There was a chinese saying, 'u can eat whatever u want, but u cannot say whatever u want'.
Before something is said, one must always think of the consequences after saying that.
The way it is expressed also form a major part of the factor that affects how the consequences will be like.

Tonite i expressed out all the dissatisfactions, unwillingness, anger etc. etc. which i'd been hiding for the past few months to someone who meant alot to me.
But that is the only way that could lighten the burden in my heart ryte now. *sorry*

Of coz, i knew the consequences of saying wat i said. However, i really want my life to improve. I don't want to keep living in the past like how we used to be. Unconsciously perhaps. I need no u-turn. Keep moving forward. fwd fwd fwd.


Life should be well-lived. Though impermanence is the truth of life, though things are changing every single moment, though nothing lasts forever, we must always live it well. Do things that will make us feel happy and not those that will bring sorrows to us. Don't ever accept a task which u think is a burden to u. When it's
unavoidable that u will be accepting something tough, try ur very very best to turn it into something enjoyable and not letting it remains as a burden. Don't look back once u've decided on something. Don't~!

See things from another point, u'll feel different.Yep.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

~Sick~

I'm so sick of basically everything around me recently.
So sick of facing ppl around me with smiley face though i don't feel like smiling at all.
So sick of pretending that i know nothing when the truth is that i know almost everything.
So sick of doing things that i don't want to do but i don't have a choice.
So sick of letting other ppl take control over my own emotions.
So sick of holding back my tongue when i was about to ask a question.
So sick of pretending that i'm okay when i'm not.
So sick of hearing things that i don't want to hear.
So sick of ppl around me who are fakers.
So sick of promises~which we're still keeping......
So sick~ i'm really sick~ help needed~

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Why oh why.

Why am i feeling so restless when i'm supposed to be studying?
Why am i being lazy when what i should be doing is to study?
Why i cant just stop doing all the things that i love to do that i'm not suppose to do ryte now?
Why is it i'm feeling so tired when i sit down and start reading my books. n yet i could hardly fall asleep at night?
Why i cant stop the habit of drinking coffee when i'm sleepy although i knew that it doesn't work on me?
Why i still care about those unnecessary tiny matters when i have tons of work need to be completed?
Why i just keep complaining that i have not enough time to use when all this while i'm the one who is wasting time away...And why m i sitting in front of my lappie again when i said that i dont wanna online so much anymore?
Oh well, something must be done. IT is not meant to be here anymore~~shall bring it back home this friday~yuppie. hope it works.
And now that audit revision class is over, i should have noticed how near is my final exam from now.
And i shall go and prepare a schedule for topics need to be covered in these few days before MA revision classes start NOW.
Plenty of work to be done. So little time available. N i miss secondary sch days. i really really do.
I must admit that, i'm stressed. Yes I am.

Monday, May 5, 2008

Untitled.

I must put aside whatever things that are bothering me ryte now.
Care bout nothing but studies.
Stay focused and concentrate.
........ Must must must!